‘Rich Dad, Poor Dad’ by Robert T. Kiyosaki with Sharon L. Lechter C.P.A

Credits to ‘dullhunk’, Duncan Hall, Flickr

I’ve started reading Rich Dad Poor Dad and I’ve had the book for years (about 4 maybe 5) and I was all ready to come on here, after reading it, and give this book rave reviews about how good it is, how to make money and what not. Until I read this by John T Reed, with the help of reader reviews on Amazon UK which lead me to that site, and it got me thinking about some of what I had read. I’m only half way through Mr Kiyosaki’s book and there was this feeling that something was missing from the book. I mean it talks about being financially smart and how to make money but it doesn’t actually talk about how to make money. There’s these nice diagrams about expenses, income, assets and liability but there’s no real details in great depths of how these supposed money making ‘rich’ tips actually work. I thought this book would be of help, well it did in a way. It got me to think about my money even more, something that I do all the time!! Albeit not in a way that is of more use to myself.

I work, earn a wage, save a bit and then buy smartly and cheaply. I learnt that lesson the hard way a few years back from just blowing my money on crap! The book started off good as we learn about ‘Rich Dad’s’ philosophy on money. He’s just money focused but some the of points, whoever this ‘Rich Dad’ is, raises I quite agree with. Like ‘how can I afford it?’ (page 17) and it gets you thinking if what you’re thinking of buying is worth it. I do that already. He states to have assets and then make money work for you, not the other way around, as it should be bringing returns making it ‘easy’ to be rich. But it’s on the ‘Rich Dad’ philosophy of exploiting people and getting out of tax.

However, if I work for the money and do the right things with it then it shall work for me right? I mean if I learn from my own stupidity and put it where it needs to be then my money should be working for me right? The money works right? Right? Because if I save my money, bit by bit and buy what is essential for my living, then money and myself should have a good working relationship right? The point I’m getting at, is that, right now, the money is working for the moment isn’t it?!  So even without assets my money is working for me. And really I’m not getting any richer, maybe having more sense after my own disasters.

Did I really need to read the book is the bigger question?!  

He states in the book that everyone works and saves and they don’t get rich because that’s what everyone else does. But how is a person suppose to have assets if they don’t save?! It’s contradicting.

There’s this big theme about the have’s and have not’s, rich and poor, educated and uneducated. ‘Poor Dad’ is educated but is in big time debt because he doesn’t make his money work for him, as he works for the government instead of working for himself with his own business. But isn’t that like everyone? Well almost everyone. Okay, I don’t know the exact numbers other than a generalisation from my own perspective. Some people work for someone with or without the debt. Anyway, this in relation to ‘Rich Dad’ who left school at 13 and was ‘rolling in it’.

Education takes a bit hit in this book, it’s like being educated is a bad thing. And my Grandparents always told me to make sure you get your education, it was about getting an education so that you can go further than they were/are. They didn’t really get much of an education, in fact it was zero, and they worked hard and that’s inspirational for myself. They wasn’t rich but comfortable. Their education was life. This book somewhere does speak about going to get an education on being taught about money and being financially able. I agree that everyone, everywhere should be taught about finances however not at the expense of a real education. If you make it without it fine, you’re lucky (and I don’t mean that in a patronising way) but there has to be some form of real effort. Whether that’s street smarts, book smarts or just plain sense. Without it not much gets done sadly and really without some form of money not much will get done either.

The analysis by Reed is in depth and the writer has done his research and it has made me open my eyes when it comes to believing what has been written in this best-seller. I was going to buy the other books but if people have been saying on Amazon UK that the books are repetitious, doesn’t teach anything and could just be written on an A4 piece of paper then is it worth the investment? He talks about investments so much so should I be investing even more? I invested my time, that’s bad enough, but money? Maybe not, I didn’t even pay for my copy anyway so I’m not at a big loss. Though, it would be worth going to the bookshop and spending a couple hours going over his other books (I love doing that by way, it’s a great way to see if the book is even worth paying for anyway before I waste money on a book that I won’t like, enjoy or be of any use) and coming to my own conclusions. But with this information in hand I may just be biased towards it all.

The reviews on Amazon UK made me think, how could people be saying this? Did they miss the point? What isn’t there to get? When in fact they hadn’t missed the point. Rather they did what I hadn’t done, which was question it, instead of agreeing to it! There’s a lesson I’ve picked up. It feeds my desire to have money so obviously and naively I’m going to take whatever it says as being the real deal. I missed my critical analysis.

As I read this post back, I sound vague and that isn’t on purpose it’s because this is just my own scrape through of what I’ve understood so far and having an alternative perspective. It’s also because the beginning of the book made more sense to me than what I’ve read so far and to be honest, I don’t even feel to read the rest of it. It’s like a motivational tool with no real solutions so in short it’s false advertising. I have abundance cards for motivation, to feel the abundance and attract it. Not to spend most of my day reading a book that tells me what I’ve already gathered from my own losses.

Peace out xxx

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Constantly Saying Sorry…

I have found myself saying sorry more than enough times even for things that are not even apology worthy. I mean take this example:

Someone asks someone to do something at a time whilst they are sleeping. The person who is sleeping becomes annoyed with having to be woken up as what they’re doing at that moment is sleeping and that’s what they want to do. The asker gets annoyed with the sleeping person’s sharp answers of ‘whatever’ and ‘I’m sleeping’ and wants to cause harm to that person. It turns out later upon waking that the sleeping person realises that they had some sort of conversation but wasn’t sure. However, they then apologises for their sharpness.

Should they have really apologised?

In the short answer, no! In the long answer, no!  They shouldn’t have apologised because the asker was asking for it. There is more than one way to ask for someone to do something for you like leaving a note, making a phone call later on in the day or sending a text message. If you know you’re dealing with a person who likes their sleep then save the request for an appropriate time. There’s no use being hurt about a situation that could have been avoided in the first place. Guilt tripping the person into feeling bad for actually wanting to sleep gets the apology the asker desires but doesn’t deal with the fundamental problem of not respecting the sleeping person in the first place.

Yes, the example is myself , the sleeping someone is myself. Its quite amazing to notice that I have to speak about myself as the third person in order for me to see what I should have saw in the first place. I kind of get why I, still at my age, keep apologising for saying or doing things that is right in my being. There are times when apologising is a must and there is no question about it. I’m wrong I say sorry with no if’s, but’s or maybe’s about it. But I lose my confidence each and every time I say sorry when I shouldn’t be and this is becoming a problem for me to deal with. It kind of gives people the right, the okay to just say and do as they please without actually taking responsibility for their part in a situation and that leaves me at a loss. Being silenced with guilt and knowing that in some way I’m inadequate.

I have my own feelings and my own point view. Ever noticed that in Coming Out I apologised for not wanting to be rude about stating my own case? Why apologise for my own passions or the way how I feel in order to make another comfortable? I’ve realised that in some way for me to get an apology out of another is like pulling teeth without the dentistry qualification, it doesn’t happen or if it does sometimes then there has to be some sort of tie to the apology, i.e ‘what am I going to get out of apologising to you?’. That cheapens it, that’s a cheap way of saying sorry. If you don’t want to then don’t, save me the time and carry on doing what you’re doing.

I’m tied of it now, soon I’ll be apologising for breathing. Telling my friend the truth when I say ‘no’. I find myself falling into that pattern and that’s what it is a pattern and something that needs to be broken.

Peace out. xx

Interesting and very thoughtful

talinorfali

There are so many things that are important in life to know and understand all types of people, knowing how to read people, knowing how to differentiate between being with the wrong people and the right people. It is super important to surround yourself always with different types of people and get to know their mind set and to know their personality, traits, attitudes, actions, their trail of thought about things. Its so imperative to know this. Some people come into your life as blessings because they are the right type of people to be with who are true to you, who would never lie to you, who would never betray you and your trust, someone who will always be your backbone, someone who will be part of your life and stay their with no strings attached. Some people come into your life as lessons. Sometimes friendships, relationships, do not…

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My Taste of Astrology

I like astrology, in fact I actually love it. I like looking at my natal chart and seeing what is going on where, in what house and how the energy plays out in my life on a day to day level as well as over a long term.

I have a Scorpio sun sign, ahh yes… all the negatives rolled into one: cynical, obsessive, jealous, revengeful etc etc. But there is also generous, caring, loving, and er well that’s all I can think of at the moment off the top of my head. Surprising really! You would have thought that as being born under that sign I would focus more on the positive than the negative but in some strange way I only really know the negative because the negative is all I’ve told about. Being too generous=you should be more selfish, be more selfish=being selfish. There’s no winning with it really. Oh well, I’m under a ‘powerful’ sun sign who’s full of mystery, apparently. Ha-ha-ha, I joke! Of course it’s powerful and a mystery. Ruled by Mars and Pluto, two plants that have get up go and Pluto more so being so in the underworld with the mask that is worn not giving anything away. Every time I go out I have to wear a mask of indifference… it’s called my neutral face. It doesn’t glow unless it has to, it doesn’t show teeth and smile unless it has to, we’ll call it a serious demeanour.

Even though I’m a Scorpio, I dislike some other Scorpio’s. Strange I know but I can’t take the probing and the quizzical looks. Some leave me to it and allow me to be and others have this desire to probe and prod. I can understand why some people react strongly to a Scorpio when you either like them or you don’t. I may just leave that down to my Mars in Aquarius who needs the freedom to be free! I have a strong Mars and a strong Pluto.

Scorpio is a water sign, funnily enough. All about emotion, emotion, emotion and more emotion. The saying goes ‘still waters run deep’ so whilst you’re dealing with that ‘dumb’ Scorpio who knows nothing, they know everything. They’ve noticed things you haven’t and seen you when you think they haven’t.

I have a Scorpio stellium, that means there is more than two planets in that sign, so I’m more Scorpio than any other sign. I like it, I enjoy it.

You should check out your own birth chart, it’s more accurate when you know your time of birth and place of birth, and see what you find out about your own birth chart and yourself. Nothing is negative just a part of who you are.

Peace out xx

Christmas On My Own

This year I have chosen to spend Christmas on my own. I have seen all of my family before Christmas Day anyway. But this year I’ve decided to be a lone wolf and go it alone. As I’ve started writing this on Christmas Eve I’m actually looking forward to it. I may not be able to give out my food as I cook but at least I get to eat what I like without other people saying what it and isn’t liked by others. I get to watch what I like on my own tv.

I have bought myself a few gifts and bits that I’ve bought earlier this month have been wrapped too seeing as I haven’t watched the dvds or listened to the cds yet. Its like treating myself to something as I feel a little guilty at any other time of the year. I hope I’m home alone though as I live with other people but I have my own room so I can close my door and do my own thing.

However, now its Boxing Day… I actually had a good Christmas on my own. I played music, opened my gifts, took a nice bath and made some nice food that I’m gonna enjoy for the next couple of days. I watched my soaps and indulged in solitude. I was in the Christmas spirit but within my own traditions. I know it can be a ‘sad’ and ‘lonely’ thing being on your own but I made the most of it. Best thing is that all my flatmates left so I had the house to myself. Nicely.

Hope you had a good Christmas and I wish you a happy new year.

Coming Out

Coming out is hard, its the hardest thing a person could do. I came out as a lesbian 2 years ago. That was easy for me to say… ‘I’m seeing and sleeping with another girl’, well woman really. However for those around me it was a hard shock! Understandably, I was the hetro-girl who had a hetro-relationship for years. I met a girl and fell in love and really the rest is history (sounds so cheesy but that’s how it happened).

The hardest thing for me though in this process has been the attitude of some people who I use to call friends and family. The most significant was a ‘friend’, of 11 years, who told me that my ‘acts’ behind closed doors were ‘wrong’ especially in the eyes of The Lord but yet they’re not religious. Hypocrite anyone?! The need to bring up my past history, that I’m ‘confused’ and that its a ‘phase’. Bearing in mind she asked how my love life is and I don’t see the point in lying to friends. At first I understood the need they had to understand but then almost a year later it became unbearable. It turned almost toxic. No! It was toxic and that toxic attitude has stuck with me almost 8 months now since I decided to end the friendship.

Now, you may wonder why I’ve written about coming out and why I’ve included that little story. Its to highlight how hard and sometimes how easy this process can go. I felt good to say what was going on with me because it was good for myself. There were a few supportive people and I’ll love them forever. However with the negative reactions it felt and still feels like [at times] who I am and what I do needs the approval of those around me and to be honest that puts me on edge. And I think, more importantly I’m 90% certain, that many other LGBT people feel the same way when they tell someone else the ‘secret’ part of themselves. Especially if they’ve had negative reactions or they have that hate towards themselves for being gay/les/trans/bi etc. I had that hate towards myself until I realised that its about their reactions and not my own actual feelings.

The worst thing that can be done, when as a friend/family member etc, when this piece of knowledge becomes your business is to get highly defensive with someone who is being so open. What are you defensive for?! I mean, really is this persons sexuality and lifestyle gonna stop you from functioning?! Or is your lack of growth stopping you from seeing past your own nose?! Plus the need to get overly religious and bring out all this bible speak as though you’re a walking talking King James Version of the bible. Sorry I may sound a little rude but these are some feelings that have been bottled up.

With my ‘friend’, of 11 years, I realised her problem with my sexuality isn’t the fact that she thinks she’s gonna lose a friend, that the bad things in my past have affected me or all the men I’ve been with, who have apparently ‘let me down’ in her suggestive questioning [to which I answered ‘no’ with clear reasoning to then be met with a dismissal of ‘well I think you’re confused’], have anything to do with it. Its more the case of not having the courage to actually live outside of what is ‘normal’. There is no such thing as ‘normal’ in the real world! Sorry I had to break the news, its sad to know but its somewhat true that ‘normal’ doesn’t exist. So cry a river, build a bridge and get over it.

You see my past is full of heartbreak, sob stories and pain and when someone gets used to hearing how bad your life is, more often than not, they enjoy you being there. They get to look tall whilst you look small. That’s a lot more sadder than the actual heartbreak and pain of my actual past. I lived my past no need for the reminder, I know my feelings… I don’t know what brought me to be a lesbian from my past but I’m damn sure comfortable and happy now. Doesn’t that matter?! Or do we live in a parallel universe?!

By the time she was able to accept it, a year and a half later, the damage had been done and no amount of my regulatory damage control could turn back time. I had already distanced and cut myself off the last time she called. I cringe at how much time I actually gave it but it shows I actually have compassion and a heart.

Its been a hard 2 years and I’ve felt that pain even knowing who’s for me and who isn’t. I’m telling you now… That if you wish to keep to a friend/family member etc, when they come out to you try your damn hardest to not allow your prejudices to get in the way and ruin what could be a greater, deeper and more meaningful relationship with that person. As long as they’re happy where’s the issue?!

It isn’t about YOU. It isn’t about how YOU feel, its about how THEY feel. See, understand, recognise and respect that. They’ll thank you for it in the long run. Allow a person to OWN their sexuality, its fluid anyway and its personal to them not YOU.

Peace out. xx

25… Mid-Life Crisis

I’m 25 and that was over a month ago. I’m doing a degree course that I don’t really enjoy because I have been convinced that getting a degree and going to university is the right way to go. But at 16 I didn’t know what to do or who to be. Well ok I wanted to be a Hairdresser and do that as a course after my GCSE’s but I was convinced by my Mother that it wasn’t the best career path. I should study A-Levels instead and go to university to have ‘the opportunity’ she didn’t have.

Fair enough parents want what’s best for their children but not at the expense of not actually trying to do what they actually like at that time. Yes, I am blaming however only partially. I should have just done what I wanted instead of listening to a person who’s instilling fear into me about a chosen career path. ‘That isn’t good enough’ and ‘I work with this woman who trained to be a hairdresser and now she no longer does that… That’s why you shouldn’t go into that career’. *A big sigh!!!!!*. So I went to a 6th form college instead of 6th form at school, I wanted to get out of that place, and did a AVCE (equivalent to 2 A-Levels) and an AS (lower A-Level). I was still moaned at for not staying at school but what was I going to study?! Its not until a teacher said to me that I could do another qualification in something I like as it isn’t the only option.

I applied to university, got in and took a gap year because I wasn’t sure about university then. I can’t even remember what I picked. I just picked a course related to my AVCE and one that was as far as possible. In that gap year I met a guy, fell pregnant, quit university before starting and my pregnancy fell through. I was working but somewhere that I wouldn’t see my whole life in as its un-fulfilling.

Anyway at 25 I’m looking back on those last 9 years as a learning curve, albeit in a sort of psychological backlash where I’m tearing my mind, life and what others expected of me to shreds. Most people at my age are wondering about getting married and having babies and even though I am a bisexual I’m not really worrying about that really just the career and direction I’m trying to build.

It feels like a mid-life crisis but this is a crisis where your expectations and responsibility lies with YOU and solely YOU. There’s this big expectation that at 25 your life should be sorted, you should have a career, have the mortgage, have, have and more have! And I sit here wondering to myself… What do I have to show for it at the moment?! A lot but it isn’t fulfilling, soul reaching nor heartfelt.

At this moment in time I want to be a hairdresser, chef, nurse, teacher, life guru/coach, midwife, photographer, actress, film maker, entrepreneur, tarot/angel/medium/astrological reader etc etc. The list is so endless as I chop and change my mind daily, weekly, monthly and yearly. I know its a lot of careers but its like ‘being jack of all trades, master of none’ and I would like to be a master of at least one of the things that interest me.

It may seem like I should just quit university and stop wasting my time but something keeps saying to me that I should just wait it out. I’m in my 2nd year and I really only have one more year to go, 26 going on 27 by the time I graduate. So what’s the big rush?! I think its part of my expectation that you go to uni, get this degree and build a career from there. But does it really happen like that? (Thoughts please). But in someway I have a  plan I suppose and I’m still working, though it isn’t the greatest job, just something to put food in my belly and pay my bills, but there’s an outline of a plan nonetheless. I should be proud and feel good about that.

I know I’m young and I still have time but it feels like time is running out. Societal pressure to be this and that by a certain age creates more pressure than actually just taking my time to create the life I as a person actually desires. I’m having a chuckle to myself as I think about this. ‘If you don’t laugh you’ll cry’ so I’d rather laugh and see the humour.

Going from Kidulthood to Adulthood (courtesy of Bashy – Kidulthood to Adulthood from the Adulthood ost). I’m attempting to embrace and really I should.

Peace out xx

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